Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Write on Wednesday: The saddest thing I ever heard

Write On Wednesdays Exercise 25 - I heard a song on the radio during the week and I thought the lyrics would make an interesting prompt for WoW. So, write the words "The saddest thing I ever heard" on your page, set your timer for 5 minutes and write the first words that come into your head based on the given prompt.
Write On Wednesdays

Everything about the weather is wrong. The sun is shining brilliantly in the clear blue sky, even while a storm ravages my soul. Chirping birds busy themselves near the stone bath, making a cheery fuss over the freshly blooming spring day. Even the blue tulips around my mailbox seem to dance in the light breeze.
It's all wrong. I would prefer rain falling steadily from a dark and angry sky, while lightning bolts pierce through the clouds like javelins. That, at least, would make sense.
With the perverse humor of the weather, Hunter strolls from the house with his last bag, whistling. Whistling! It is the final stitch unraveling from the tattered mess our relationship has become. He is happy to leave me. The last fifteen years meant so little to him that he can leave me behind humming a merry tune all the way. I watch him from the porch of our home that in an instant becomes just a house, a stack of bricks and mortar: a tomb of memories. He tosses his bag into the passenger seat as he climbs into his recently acquired cherry red coupĂ©.
The last sound before he heads off into his life after me is the resolute slamming of the car door. It is the saddest thing I ever heard.
Be sure to check out the other WoW posts here.


  1. I really love the intensity of her emotions. Also, describing the weather and the lightning goes well with her frustrations. "A tomb of memories" is brillant! The descriptions of the house that was once a home marks a point in her life.

  2. That was a very good piece and is one that I can identify with. Well done!

  3. Great - love it. I love the juxtaposition between the weather and the situation. You have done this beautifully, it makes each one more amplified.

    I would give you... let's see.... a HA+/VHA-. {I am proofreading report cards... it is getting into my brain}

  4. I like the "tomb of memories" too. Powerful piece. It is almost cruel, the way the weather seems to taunt in this situation. x

  5. This is really good. Like really, really good. (Pardon my teenage lingo)
    I love the main character and her way of thinking and the delicate touch of humor that surrounds the power of her feelings. I loved it.

  6. Fantastic, I really love the line, "with the perverse humor of the weather". Potent and intense, lovely writing.

  7. It's like everything is conspiring against her including the weather.

    I can really feel her pain.

    Brilliant as always!

  8. Oh WOW! Great job. I'm feeling a little depressed now. I think you've definitely picked some very "sad" things going on here. Wonderful writing.

  9. Ow... I love the misery this piece seethes. You described wonderfully how the characters' home had suddenly become just a stack of bricks and mortar --"a tomb for memories" is an exquisite line--, and the second paragraph evokes beautiful imagery with the lightning as javelins and the sky being dark and angry. Have I mentioned that I love your way with words, Lillie?

    Oh, and I agree with you and Gill: the weather's discrepancy with the way we feel inside can be devastatingly cruel. I'm very happy you began your piece with that.

    / Rain

  10. Misery, bubbling anger, and yes, like TV says, that little hint of humour. I feel like that will get her through.
    Well done Miss Lillie!
    (I haven't managed to write WoW but will try to do 5 sentence Fiction this weekend!)

  11. I am obviously way behind. I thought you were writing based on the candle picture (this week's WoW). My first reaction was, "I have no idea how she got that from the image, but it's good."

    Lovely piece, Lillie. Unfortunately we've probably all experienced that "whistling" soul who is just grateful to get out of a relationship. You've tapped into something universal.